I feel like I should be doing something, like being productive and just making stuff happen. But I don't know what to do, where to start and I just feel so scattered. My thoughts are every where and I can't seem to grasp what I want and how to get it. I feel like I need to go soul searching..
It's like I'm headed towards an unset destination, I'm trying to find a way to get there, but I just end up exasperated. I hold the screams inside of me, balling up a wall of tension between my heart and my mind, wanting to truly make something out of all this passion that I possess, but not knowing absolutely what to make of it. I want to travel and see the world, love someone and share every beautiful moment with them. Come on, who doesn't? But this ideal seems so inaccessible right now.
Right now I just feel vulnerable and lonely, and in my own little world, with some visitors here and there that find a way in, a way to understand a part of me. Some people without me realising allow me to present a glimpse of this world and more often than not they surprise me by telling me that I possess wisdom, when in my reality all that I say are just plain observations of this life I lead, things I almost even consider common sense. I just want to find an escape and sore free and know that tomorrow will be okay and know that not growing up is okay and know that if I have enough heart I will succeed- that one day I won't have to just keeping wishing, and dreaming, and looking at the people I wish I were. That happiness and love will come to those who are patient.
I guess sometimes when you want something so much, it might actually break you.
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